Reverence of The Marks & Symbols of Ownership

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I spoke of Faith. Now…I’ll kneel to Reverence. Our first date. I stood calmly in His bedroom. Still. Waiting. A lioness’ instinctive understanding short-circuited my usual primal sexual aggression. I knew this man before I knew Him. Though desire and need raged through my veins, my lioness lowered her head in acquiescence to a Power she had known before time began and been searching for this entire lifetime. I waited. Utterly defenseless. To see how He would move. To see what He would want of me. To see which direction He would Lead us. He shifted behind me in the dim light. His first touch. A bold unmistakable Claim. With a deliberate slowness that seemed to last eternity, His fingers dug into my biceps as His teeth sank into my tender flesh where neck meets shoulder. My body gave into His strength. My mind let go of logic. My heart and soul gratefully surrendered to His Demand. I will always feel the echoes of the Marks He gave me in that moment. That was only the beginning. With ...
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When a Sleeping Lioness is Poked

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It's been an odd few weeks...outing myself to a distance acquaintance against my better judgement, my slave self making a spontaneous appearance in an unhealthy situation, a heartbreaking confession, a confrontation with a bully who escalated dumb shit to put his hands on me and ended up on the floor for it, a non-consenting witness to group therapy.  I've racked up a fair share of negative encounters in a short amount of time.  None of them earth shattering or world-changing by any means.  I'm just not at my best.  All of it has left my energy in a funk that I'm not sure how to dissipate.

My Lioness is wide awake after having been in a coma for much of the last year, and it wasn't passion and sexiness that woke her.  She definitely rolled off the wrong side of the bed from all the pokes and prods.  She's not angry, but she is annoyed and watchful.  Her claws are unsheathed.  She paces.

I know I am well equipped to handle almost anything that comes my way.  I'm strong.  I'm fierce.  I'm competent.  However, that doesn't give anyone the right to take advantage of my kindness or swing at me because I can take it.

While my circle is growing, I need to be ever cognizant that few have my best interest at heart.  Fewer still have skin in the game and are willing to protect me.  Yes, cheerleaders are absolutely appreciated, but even the best quarterback can't win a game without a defensive line.

Hmmmm...Maybe that's adding to the icky energy I'm carrying.  Each challenging encounter has forced me to face the reality that I am unowned—that no one protects me or even gives me a place to curl up when I'm weary.  I've done a helluva job over the last few years taking care of myself.  Maybe...I'm just a tired at the moment.  Not everything can be/could have been avoided.  Though, maybe it's time for me to be more selective (~cough~...in control) of my environment.

A good plan going forward but it doesn't provide me an answer for how to clear out this unsettled energy.  My Lioness doesn't have to go back to her coma.  I'd just appreciate it if she'd stop the incessant pacing.  ~sigh~  I'll start with a circle and burning sage tonight.  If that doesn't help, maybe a good ass whooping would.
~DominaKat

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