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Showing posts with the label S&M.NYC

The Edge of His Darkness

It’s 3am. I should be unconscious, earning another two or three face creases from sleeping soundly on His t-shirt, but in the shadows and silence and blessed fuckin stillness, I selfishly steal the time from my pile of obligations to travel back to our last night, our last morning, and just savor the memories.  Words, images, moments flicker through my mind.  Until I settle there.  That.  I hit replay and replay and replay. Fuck. What He did to me….   What I can’t even bring myself to fuckin type.  Even here. No one has dared.  Except Him.  Except Him.  Except Him. Looking back, I see clearly the presence I had felt.  It was there.  In the look carved on His face.  The edge of a Darkness that He holds tightly at bay had come to watch me.  Somehow... after so long... I had caught His interest again.   I met His gaze without fear, and His vicious response was absolute. There was no warning.   No preparing me to take what was to come.   He. Gave. Me. No. Choice.   And in the quiet deep o

The Climb to the Next Step

Anyone who knows me or has been in a class/discussion/panel/meeting with me knows I have something to say about 85% of the time.  I don't speak from ego or for attention.  I'm an idealist, so the ideas and discussion are my focus and where I find my passion.  Seriously...I can get wet from conference sessions .  ~eye roll~  I'm weird.  I know.  My point is...the learning, discussing, knowledge sharing is my zen! While I try not to speak unless my comments, thoughts, or ideas have relevance to the discussion, the value of my words is always subjective to the listener, and since my attention is trained on the presentation or discussion at hand, I'm usually oblivious to whether my words resonate to people.  This is pretty much the case with my writings as well.  I don't write for an audience.  I write to unpack, sort through, and assemble the puzzle pieces in my mind.   Over time as I've attended community events and even created and/or hosted my own events, I star

A Return to Pleasure

No lie, it's been waaaaaay too fucking long, and with the pandemic it's been incredibly difficult to create consistent sources of pleasure.  So difficult I'd forgotten what soul deep pleasure even felt like until tonight.  I was not ready.  I didn't have a clue what was in store for me.   Forty-five minutes into the most decadent, slow, insistent, thorough yet subtle mouth-fucking I've ever had, shivers ran down my spine as my senses and nerve endings finally caught up with and began to interpret correctly the seduction and sheer joy of my experience.  My entire body tingled, and in that instant when the visceral responses flooded my system...I surrendered and nearly cried. There was no rush.  Every minute felt longer than the last.  I never knew a leisurely mouth-fucking could be so damn epic.  Those steady, unassuming, nuanced strokes teased me with each mouthful.  My greedy lips gentled and discovered a rare patience as I sank into the wonder and delight of every

My Masochist v3.0 - How to Explore

My masochist is one of the least explored out of all of my bottom-ish kinky personas.  Yeah, I've experienced pain but not through a smorgasbord of different types of implements, styles, or scenes.  Honestly, despite my near decade in the lifestyle, I could probably count the number of S&M scenes I've experienced on just a round or two of using my fingers and toes.  Don't get me wrong.  I've had some fucking amazing out-of-this-world scenes, but yeah, it's been one of the most frustratingly difficult aspects of my journey to progress and expand. The reins now lay fully in my hands. Obviously, I need to find viable, trustworthy play partners who will be comfortable with my experience level, interested in my goals, and able to accept my limitations.  Putting the play partner finding aside, I really do need to delve into MY goals and limitations.  You'd think after so long, I'd be able to rattle off my goals and limitations without even thinking.  Howe

Introducing: S&M.NYC

Well...I've gone and done it, with some great help of course!  ~HAT TIP~  I've been itching for the last year for more on S&M.  By more, I mean beyond the usual basic demo class that pops up every once and a while.  I've been hungry for meaty discussions about the in's, out's, approaches, tactics, thought process, etc.  Living in your own bubble is NEVER good.  We all need diverse thoughts and opinions to keep our minds engaged and kink creative, soooo... I've started an S&M Discussion Group in NYC.  My goal:  Create a safe, sane, fun space for S&M discussion.  That's it.  I am by no means an expert on ANY of this shit.  I've got no ego in this.  No political agenda.  I just love to learn and grow and discuss WIITWD and wanted to give back a little to the community that's given me so much. If you're interested in S&M, please join me and BlackMusic (your meeting hosts) on the first Monday of every month for what we hope will be