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Showing posts with the label Service Boundaries

The 9 Service Languages | Intensive Session Wrap Up Thoughts

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On Sunday, I wrapped up my first small group FULL INTENSIVE workshop that spanned 6+ hours over the course of 2 days. Anyone who has sat through my Intro class knows, The 9 Service Languages is a fucking BIG IDEA! When I first launched my class, I naively believed it could be tackled in a typical 90-minute or 2-hour session. I quickly learned that was impossible and that few platforms (cons, orgs, mtgs) had the ability to hold space for me and attendees to get DEEP in the weeds of WIITWD as it relates to Service. I am PROFOUNDLY HONORED that @S-O-C—the Service Oriented Conference—reached out to me earlier this year to be a part of their inaugural Intensive Program. They were the perfect partner with the perfect target audience for an Intensive of The 9 Service Languages of Authority Transfer Relationships/Dynamics. The session allowed me to work with a small group as we got our hands dirty, dissecting where, when, how, and why we do Service and considered ways to adjust, tweak, evol...
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Laundry Service Revelations

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Shit. I folded his clothes. I’m not joking. I got within two feet of that soft warm heap of pants, shirts, tees, briefs, and socks, and my hands instinctively dove in like I’d done this for him a thousand times before.  Zero hesitation.  I paused briefly in shaking out a shirt to ask a quick question on preference and kept right on serving...In sheer fuckin bliss. SMH. Context...I haven’t folded a man’s clothes in over seven years. Hell, I don’t even fold my own clothes.  NYC's relationship with laundry is a bit different than most of this country's.  Between no in-apartment appliances and a sucky commute that eats an entire functional day a week, it’s NYC drop off service for me, please and thank you.  However, it's more than just practicalities responsible for the seven year hiatus, and there is a significance within my simple actions that I can’t ignore. Truth | I essentially have a long-established hard limit: Unless there is an emergency, urgent need, o...
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Reflection & a New Path

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SPLF 23 represented a abrupt shift in my journey.  I wasn't prepared to be seen, to be acknowledged in the sea of humanity, to be wrapped in tight hugs. let alone be fiercely protected and held firmly side-by-side.  I was both deeply humbled and profoundly honored.  Many times. Those five days in Dallas moved me and pushed me on another new path of transformation. After years of pandemic coping that focused only on areas in my life I could evolve, I remembered I had a heart. And...After years of watching how individuals moved/did not move, stood/did not stand, built/attempted to destroy, were 100% authentic/fakers of funk, driven by idealistic goals/greedy self-promotion, I realized I needed fucking space to breathe. Since the Spring, I've been reevaluating how I move, what I give, when I should engage, where I need to be, and who I directly or indirectly offer my co-signature.  I've taken many healthy steps to create a more positive environment for myself and connec...
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CLASS WRITE UP | Know Your Service Boundaries (for BOTH sides of the /) | Lessons from the Trenches of a Service Whore

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Title  |  Know Your Service Boundaries (for BOTH sides of the /) | Lessons from the Trenches of a Service Whore ~a part of the 9 Service Languages curriculum~ Format  | Lecture-Based Presentation with Slide Deck, Menti Polling & Group Discussion Duration  | ~ 90m Target Audience  | Beginner-Intermediate-Advanced in Service-Oriented Roles little & BIG Letters anyone in service to a partner, relationship, House, organization, event, or the Community at Large Description  | Service—a cornerstone for many who practice Authority Transfer or engage with the Community—is treated almost as social currency within the Lifestyle or even the tithe we offer our beliefs.  However, while we fully support, embrace, and champion S&M Boundaries, little is ever even whispered about Service Boundaries.  This silence is a detriment to the individuals involved as well as to the overall Community.  Most of us can name at least one person who has sacrifi...
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