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Showing posts from May, 2020

In Tatters

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I knelt at His feet in the utter mess I’d made. My struggle to succeed was stark. No one had ever seen me so disheveled…in such embarrassing circumstances. As He cleaned me up for the second time two minutes, I looked up to meet His steady gaze and tried to gauge his reaction. Disgust at another disastrous, completely unimpressive act of service? Frustrated at my inability to get it together? Sadistically amused at another ridiculous unglamorous predicament I’d once again found myself in? I knew he was taking in every fucking minute detail of the wreck before Him and squirreling it away in the vault of His mind, but what did He feel? His stoic expression offered me no hint. Without comment He stood firm in front of me. Fuckin unwavering. He hadn’t walked away. He hadn’t stepped back. I swear He may have even leaned in. As soon as I’d semi-collected myself, I began my third attempt even as I tried in vain to push the remaining proof of my ineptitude out of view, hoping it would simply
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My FUCK Covid! Post

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FUCK, Covid!  I've been a socially defiant bitch more often than not.  When the world starts going one way, something in my mind always tells me to jump off that bus. Yeah...this fucking sucks.  Everywhere for everyone it sucks.  COVID (either it or the fear/threat of it) is everywhere.  But for fuck sake...does it HAVE to insinuate itself FULLY into Fet?!? If Facebook has turned into a political, socially dividing, fact-checking, misleading propaganda machine, then FetLife has turned into a giant mother fucking emotional therapy support center of tears and sniffles and traumatized blank stares. Look...I get it!  This shit is HARD...physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.  I've been sheltering-in-place for 67 days in a NYC apartment with no private backyard, no balcony, no front stoop.  I need and want an escape...but since the hot, fun, and sexy has all but evaporated from my favorite kink site, Fet's only escape option is a list of virtual classes where
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My First Lessons in Service

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Ten years ago when I first found the lifestyle, I'd also moved into my brother's little house at the end of a dead end road on the edge of town.  He'd shifted to a larger place for him and his family, and he pretty much told me...do whatever—as little or as much as—you want.  To put it kindly, he'd handed me enough to keep my busy for years.  Beyond the main backyard were several acres with the property that were EXTREMELY overgrown, and I mean chest-HIGH!  All I could see beyond that edge where lawn met wild were treetops that reached for the Ohio sky. From the first day I woke up to the birds and the breeze at the FOS (The Fortress of Solitude) I worked to make a difference to my surroundings.  Once I'd gotten the house somewhat settled, I started to pull overgrown weeds that bordered the yard.  I had no idea what I'd find once I got into the thick of it all, but the woods called to my soul.   Every day, I'd tug on my leather work gloves and pr
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