In Tatters

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I knelt at His feet in the utter mess I’d made. My struggle to succeed was stark. No one had ever seen me so disheveled…in such embarrassing circumstances. As He cleaned me up for the second time two minutes, I looked up to meet His steady gaze and tried to gauge his reaction. Disgust at another disastrous, completely unimpressive act of service? Frustrated at my inability to get it together? Sadistically amused at another ridiculous unglamorous predicament I’d once again found myself in? I knew he was taking in every fucking minute detail of the wreck before Him and squirreling it away in the vault of His mind, but what did He feel? His stoic expression offered me no hint. Without comment He stood firm in front of me. Fuckin unwavering. He hadn’t walked away. He hadn’t stepped back. I swear He may have even leaned in. As soon as I’d semi-collected myself, I began my third attempt even as I tried in vain to push the remaining proof of my ineptitude out of view, hoping it would simply
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Head-Heart-Soul Shift

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Not in a good headspace. Too much. Too little. The negative has seeped in and is starting to drag me under. No one can shift it but me. Time for some gratitude and change in perspective.
I am so very grateful for…
  • My health.
  • My family.
  • My lil leather & kink tribe.
  • My Board of Directors who advise me from their thoughtful outside perspective on all things vanilla and Lifestyle.
  • The opportunities of service I’ve had in the last two years with ONYX Pearls NY-NE and with Leather Solidarity Collective.
  • The vast myriad of discussions I’ve had in my own Lifestyle groups as well as other organizations.
  • The treasure trove of books by Lifestyle Authors with their wealth of knowledge and ideas.
  • The amazing, kind, brilliant people I work with M-F.
  • The profoundly beautiful and life altering experiences I’ve had in meditation the last 8 months.
  • My occasional ability to help those in need.
  • The opportunities I have to share my lil bits of wisdom I sometimes manifest.
  • The phenomenal resilience of NYC.
  • My ability to be out to my family about my Lifestyle involvement.
  • Zoom for keeping us all connected and connecting MORE of us.
  • Fet which served as a Lifestyle entry point for many of us over the years.
  • For the many event producers, support teams, leaders, presenters, and volunteers who give so much time, energy, sweat, and even tears to educate the kinky and leather masses.
There…that’s better. My head, heart, and soul are back above water.

You may not always see it, but you can make a difference in the lives of others both BIG and small. Thank you to everyone who has contributed in my direction.
~DominaKat

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