In Tatters

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I knelt at His feet in the utter mess I’d made. My struggle to succeed was stark. No one had ever seen me so disheveled…in such embarrassing circumstances. As He cleaned me up for the second time two minutes, I looked up to meet His steady gaze and tried to gauge his reaction. Disgust at another disastrous, completely unimpressive act of service? Frustrated at my inability to get it together? Sadistically amused at another ridiculous unglamorous predicament I’d once again found myself in? I knew he was taking in every fucking minute detail of the wreck before Him and squirreling it away in the vault of His mind, but what did He feel? His stoic expression offered me no hint. Without comment He stood firm in front of me. Fuckin unwavering. He hadn’t walked away. He hadn’t stepped back. I swear He may have even leaned in. As soon as I’d semi-collected myself, I began my third attempt even as I tried in vain to push the remaining proof of my ineptitude out of view, hoping it would simply
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MsC | 1st Post Con Thoughts

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I've been home less than 24 hours. While the long drive home yesterday gave me time to contemplate, I'm still chewing on the unexpected direction of my 1st MsC experience. I'd ASSUMED those four days in Maryland would re-inspire my desire for an M-type in my life and the softer side of me that few folks see. Instead, every aspect of the Master/slave Conference reinforced my current solo journey and my fierce Lioness. 

LOL Don't jump to conclusions. Yeah...I know most of you did!!! My solo journey is NOT a bad thing at ALL! In fact I will be taking up that POV over the next year.  Okay, more dick in my life absolutely WOULD be appreciated, but that's a different topic...kinda. 

The truth is being unowned property the last few years has been nothing short of fucking PHENOMENAL! I've grown exponentially in my knowledge and understanding of self as well as the Lifestyle. I've evolved my surrender beyond a singular person to include Community Service and my own personal spiritual beliefs. I've honed my unique points of view and original concepts to included 3 classes and plan to shift into formal books for 2023. Finally...my ever-expanding eclectic beautiful tribe from various locations, houses, leather clubs, and organizations, I canNOT say enough about the AMAZING PEOPLE in my life, who believe so deeply in ME. They empower, enrich, champion, and advocate for me in countless ways. 

While I may at times ache for the peace and serenity of surrender to a serious Partner, that isn't the path the Universe has for me right now, and I'm okay with that. Universe, I HEARD YOU. MsC, thank you for facilitating all the things each of us needed to hear. 

We'll see where the new bridges built at MsC will take us all in the coming months! 

Before I wrap this up and call it a night as post-con self-care is a MUST, I need to send some very specific MsC shout outs... 
  • @slave_gaia_amor and @SirGuy | THANK YOU BOTH for believing in The 9 Service Languages of Authority Transfer and including my class as a part of MsC. 
  • @MrCunningLinguist | Sherpa, thank you for pressure testing my Intensive format and workbook early last week! Your insights never fail to leave me and my efforts in a better place. 
  • @_silent_ | THANK YOU for kidnapping me the week before to relax, re-center, and refresh my soul. We need to do that more often! 
  • House of WU: @DeedeeDahmer and @SirWu | You both ground me and always help me see the various pieces of the puzzle pieces we call Community. Sooooo grateful that you are both in my life! 
To you all as well as the rest of my Tribe...I am humbled by your belief in me and my work in M/s and Leather. I would not be at this point in my journey without your faith, advocacy, and contributions. ~FIERCE HUGS~ Now...let's all get that well-deserved self-care. 

Much love,
~DominaKat

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