Posts

The 9 Service Languages | Intensive Session Wrap Up Thoughts

On Sunday, I wrapped up my first small group FULL INTENSIVE workshop that spanned 6+ hours over the course of 2 days. Anyone who has sat through my Intro class knows, The 9 Service Languages is a fucking BIG IDEA! When I first launched my class, I naively believed it could be tackled in a typical 90-minute or 2-hour session. I quickly learned that was impossible and that few platforms (cons, orgs, mtgs) had the ability to hold space for me and attendees to get DEEP in the weeds of WIITWD as it relates to Service. I am PROFOUNDLY HONORED that @S-O-C—the Service Oriented Conference—reached out to me earlier this year to be a part of their inaugural Intensive Program. They were the perfect partner with the perfect target audience for an Intensive of The 9 Service Languages of Authority Transfer Relationships/Dynamics. The session allowed me to work with a small group as we got our hands dirty, dissecting where, when, how, and why we do Service and considered ways to adjust, tweak, evol...

Kat 501 – What I Can Give | Updated

I am an insatiable Lover in your life. If You can pique my interests and challenge me. I could be the strong Woman by Your side. If You are a strong, beautiful Man and make the effort to see all I am. I could be Your sweet, wicked Domina on Your arm. If You are a Sir that deserves and respects a classy lady. I could the alfred of Your dreams. If You are a Superhero of Integrity and have Goals I can believe in. I would be Your vicious Warrior ever at Your back. If You prove worthy of my sincerest respect. I could be Your ever-hungry Masochist crumpled at Your feet. If Your greedy Sadist deliciously feasts on my pain and fucks my mind. I would be Your committed, monogamous Partner in life. If You are honest, careful, considerate, and love true. I could be your wild primal prey in your sights. If You are a Dark Beast who can shelve His ego and dance with my defiance. I would be Your nasty, fucking Whore in Your arms. If You stroke my hedonistic twisted desires and che...

Conferences Make Me...

At about the 15 minute mark of the first session of the Flame Conference yesterday. I absentmindedly shifted in my chair as I sipped my DIY mocha with instant coffee and ready whip.  (Suffering is real!) I listened to the speaker, scanned the slides, scribbled copious notes in my purple book most of you have seen in my lap.  Then my subconscious started knocking at my conscious... Subconscious | ~knock knock~ Bitch, you paying attention??? Conscious | ~shifted in chair~   Huh ? ~sips chocolate, coffee, cream~ Subconscious | GURL!  Has it really been that long that you don't even know what's up? Conscious | What's up?  Where?  What?  Is there a fire?"  ~sniff~   Has the apocalypse started?  ~listens~ {pigeon sounds} Subconscious | ~groan!~ Conscious | Whaaaa...I'm in a conference session.  What is the issue?!?   ~shifts in chair~   Wait....oh shit! Subconscious | Yeeeeessss, bitch...yeeeesssssssss! Conscious | ~s...

My Needs in a TPE

My blog posts are a bit daunting to sift through, so I pulled together a short list in case the question what I'm looking for in regards to M/s ever needs a serious response. Yes, the definition of "needs versus wants" is always a thing.  My subjective criteria: If x was NOT a foundational aspect of my relationship, would it significantly impact my surrender and ability to serve?  So...if I was to have a strong 24/7 Authority-Based Relationship that encompassed most aspects of my life... My Relationship Needs in an Ideal TPE Situations To grow, learn, evolve...to positively impact me and my journey True to me | a lioness not a pirouetting renaissance fair chic or a helpless clueless lamb (I can not be less, so he can fake like he's more.) [ This Woman's Submission... ] A competent/compatible partner* I can connect with and believe in | an ability to align wills [ My Reverse Matryoshka Doll... ] To belong/be claimed/be wanted | a functional Owner/property ...

I Miss YOU

To my Community Friends & Family...I miss you!  I know I'm connecting with many of you numerous ways electronically, but I fucking MISS sharing space with YOU. I miss your warm hugs. I miss the smell of you. I miss the solid-ness of you. I miss watching you interact with those you love most. I miss that subtle look you'd send my way of "WTF?" at something someone else may have said. I miss your head leaning on my shoulder or (depending on height) my head on yours. I miss putting my hand on your arm, thigh, or chest as I laughed in joy at our conversation. I miss that side-eye glance followed by..."stop talking...I need a minute to think of all you just envisioned." I miss sitting next to you on shitty chairs in a cramped room all for the purpose of simply sharing knowledge and energy. I miss the friction of our bodies rubbing against one another as we moved through a crowded munch. I miss the shared excitement and heat as we played together i...

My Inherent Search for Power Exchange

Image
I'm not going to bullshit.  The desire right now to be well and truly Owned by an M-type who is stronger, smarter, more capable than me is visceral. Don't get me wrong.  It isn't overwhelming or crippling.  I continue to stand fucking STRONG in the face of this tsunami that has flooded NYC.  I am blessedly still working, and as soon as my day is done I start the work/effort of supporting the community I love so much however I can. Of course throughout the day I also handle a myriad of tasks.  I stay informed as much as I can on the status of all the things by catching Cuomo's press conference, scrolling the news feeds, and reading the emergency notifications.  I dash out every few days for a super quick trip to the store to replenish essentials and to stretch my legs so used to eating up two miles of the concrete jungle a day.  Most of all, I virtually connect with friends and family in an endless warm loop of love, concern, compassion, and suppo...

What to Do with Our Kinky Selves BESIDES Masturbate???

Holy shit! The calendar is clear, the fridge is stocked with a whole lot of crap you don't really want to cook, there's a stack of toilet paper in the linen closet, and binge watching NetFlix is starting to get on your nerves.  WTF do we DO with our Kinky Selves???  Do you masturbate AGAIN?!?  ~sigh~ Damn...no buzz.  If you have a few minutes to kill while your favorite device builds a charge... Listen to some kinky podcasts like: KinkyCast or Off the Cuffs or Touch of Flavor Discover some new music!  Might I suggest checking out... Jazz | Charles Mingus (personal fav - "Moanin'", Thelonious Monk (fav - "Don't Blame Me", or if you need something modern...Christian Scott aTunde Adjuah  African Beats | Thutmose - Ride with Me or WuWu,  Ajebutter22 - Ghana Bounce or Yawa,  Joey B - La Familia or No Waste Time Checkout some lifestyle-related videos (No...I don't mean porn!) Leather Leadership Conference | Classes, Panels, Keynotes from pre...

My Failure to Embrace Basic M/s Tradition | The Rebellious Non-Petitioning slave/property

The Tradition that a slave/property/s-type should/must formally petition any potential Master to be His slave is like a shard of glass in my Leather boot. No matter how many ways I look at it...the concept rips to shreds the fundamental foundation of imbalance that M/s dynamics demand. There...I've said it.  Written it.  In fucking bold font, thank you very much.  I've held back making public my very non-traditional view for over three years.  I had hoped in vain that at some point I would read, hear, SEE the wisdom and logic behind an s-initiated approach to beginning an M/s relationship.  Despite numerous books, classes, and discussions, I've yet to find an answer.  In fact the more I learn, the firmer my rejection of the "s-types should petition to serve" Tradition becomes. My issue boils down to one very clear point.  If the slave/property-type is the one who has to research an M-type to discover if there might be a good fit and then petiti...